Dear Savvy Woman,

This week I heard from past and current clients who’ve activated their Inner Goddess – and oh how I love hearing their success stories! Love ‘em! Mentoring women who are seeking more love and healthy relating is heart-opening for me not just in witnessing their growth and success, but because I always learn and grow right along with them! 

One past client gave an update about a 3+mo. relationship, and said how pivotal it was for her to work with me to turn her biggest ‘perceived obstacles’ - age and desire for children – into something she could not only own, but own without applogy!  Quickly attracting a great man who not only appreciates who she is, but also mirrores her desires!

Another client let me how grateful she is to me for helping her bring her self-love and feminine energy into play more as she struggles with a boyfriend who’s been on the fence. As she’s taking better care of herself and putting specific things into action, she not only feels like the Goddess she is, but he’s feeling it too!

If your Inner Goddess needs some re-activating,  won’t you join me next week?

On Monday, March 22nd at Therapeia Spa in San Francisco, I’ll be hosting a special evening workshop at an incredibly low cost  – only $20!

Together we’ll focus on these principles as they relate to healthy dating and relationships, and what you desire to create in your life:

• Feminine energy – are you replenishing and harnessing yours? When we’re not, we can block our receiving (chivalry doesn’t have to be dead!), we feel resentful and cranky, and find ourselves working too hard in dating, our relationships, and life in general.

 • Valuing and Loving Yourself – the foundation of any good relationship and a huge attractor in life.  Discover simple and fun ways to up your self-regard and self-love, because it’s a game-changer!

• A guided visualization – reconnecting to your Inner Goddess for empowerment, clarity and guidance.

So come join us in the relaxing lounge at Therapeia…sip wine…and invest in yourself and your life!

RSVP to assist@belovesavvy.com with the title ‘March Workshop’.  6:30 – 8:30pm, $20 at the door.  

Love,

Leslie

www.BeLoveSavvy.com

Hey Savvy Woman,

Did you catch Thursday’s Oprah show last week?  Be sure to watch it. The first segment has Patti, the “Millionaire Matchmaker” partner up with Nate Berkus to help a 41-year old woman who’s in search of a man. 

It’s a great segment, including one huge simple GEM from Patti, which I’ll share in a second, but be sure to watch the rest of the show, too (warning:  it will have you reaching for Kleenex and blessing all that you have in your life right now, while feeling so inspired).

So, even if you’re averse to Patti’s 20-girls-to-one-’rich’-guy matchmaking show that’s been on for years now, she gives very solid advice as to what guys and gals need as they navigate the love & relationship scene, such as, ’Men first fall into attraction with their eyes, women with what they hear between their ears’. 

Here’s the GEM that Patti gave to Oprah about what most stands in a woman’s way that I absolutely agree with : BELIEF.    Patti hit it on the head in reminding women that he IS indeed out there, something that I spend some time on with private clients and students who want love and relationship.  You have to believe, do whatever it takes to believe (we’ll ge to that in just a sec), keep believing, and never stop. 

Most-to-all women that seek me out professionally, or that I meet and talk with admit that they lack BELIEF:  that he’s even out there, that a happy and healthy relationship is possible for them, that they haven’t missed their boat.

On February 15th, the day after Valentine’s Day, you can step into an experience that will transform the results you’re experiencing in dating and love.   This 8 week tele-program, ” Find YOUR Mr. Right: 7 steps to attracting the love and relationship that you desire!” will transform the way you approach &  find love this year – because it will transform you.  If you haven’t had the BELIEF that you need, this is just one of the many essential things you’ll transform with my step-by-step, 8-class coaching program.  Learn more HERE.

Here’s to finding YOUR true love ~

Leslie

www.BeLoveSavvy.com

Like what you read? Get more authentic dating, love and relationship tips by signing up for my newsletter. It’s totally free. Check it out HERE.

Dear Savvy Woman,

Recently, I sent a special offer to my list where I wrote about a particular Holiday Relationship Blues experience of my own that marked a turning point for me to doing love & dating differently.  (Read my story & see my special invitation for a Love Life Breakthrough Day with me,  HERE).

Many women wrote to me, letting me know how much they appreciated my story.  It seemed to really hit a nerve as some are struggeling this holiday season with their single ‘status’.

If this is you too, I totally understand.  Whether I was absolutely without a date in sight, or I was dating ‘John’ AND realizing that ‘it’ (us) wasn’t seemingly solid enough to justify ANOTHER family introduction over eggnog – the holidays always underscored the fact that I wasn’t living in true love and experiencing the healthy relationship that I so deeply longed for. 

It was only after I took the very steps that I teach my private clients and women who participate in my programs (I’ve designed a 7 step system based on all that I’ve studied, learned and put to practice in my own & other women’s dating lives) that everything changed.  Dating and relating became way more easy and fun , and I relaxed into so much more confidence and enjoyment with the whole process – being single – and with my entire life!  Quickly, I met my honey and now husband.

If you’re dreading being single at the holidays this season, I hope you find solace in two things:  1) you won’t be feeling this way forever (especially if you take new actions), and 2) there is a solution to jump-starting your love life and feeling the polar opposite of dread with your single status.  I’m here to help you do just that.  Do you need  a ‘make-over’ in your love life? Find out more HERE.

Here’s to finding true love in 2010!

Leslie

www.BeLoveSavvy.com 

Like what you read? Get more authentic dating, love and relationship tips by signing up for my newsletter. It’s totally free. Check it out: http://www.belovesavvy.com/articles.htm.

Dear Savvy Woman,

This holiday, I’ll be visiting my family in the East Bay with my husband Larry, and then Christmas morning we’ll do stockings (love stockings!) & have brunch with friends before heading to ice skate – a fun new tradition of ours – at the outdoor rink in downtown SF.

But it wasn’t always this way.

It wasn’t that long ago that I was really struggling in dating & relationships.

I can remember one particular Christmas I rushed from celebrations with my family to hurry back to the city to meet up with my then boyfriend. We were going to have a special lunch and gift-exchange.  I handed him 5 gifts to his one for me, after which he scooted out to quickly deliver gifts to some friends visiting from out-of-town, without so much as an invitation to join him. 

I sat on his couch, fighting back tears as I waited for him to return, feeling so pathetic. I longed to be in a relationship where I didn’t have to fight for adoration, respect – or introductions on Christmas Day.

Sadly, it took me well over 6 more months before I finally decided I’d had enough of that. One day I summoned up the courage to stop the endless cycle of disappointing relationships and start doing things differently.

I started by reading a gazillion relationship books, going to seminars and let me tell you, weeding out all the fluff wasn’t easy. But in time I did find the gems and started getting better results in my love life. Most importantly I finally began to understand that dating & relationships could be so much more than what I’d ever believed to be possible.
 
Soon I began to experience an entirely new love life full of ease, fun, and a feeling of being much more in-control. Not long after my new mindset and improved self-confidence, I met the love of my life and now husband, Larry.

I’m sharing this with you because I don’t think it needs to take YOU that long.  In fact, you do not have to read a gazillion relationship books or go to countless seminars (I’ve done it for you!). Nor do you need to spend years trying to figure out why you haven’t found Mr. Right.

I have designed my own 7 step system for finding true love based on all of my experience and the simple, authentic dating strategies that empower you.

As a Love and Relationship Coach, I help women who are ready for a fulfilling relationship find true love. I work exclusively with women who are ready to do things differently and get better results in their dating and love life. I help them make better choices in men (no more repeating the same patterns!), date with confidence and fun, and how to ultimately find true love.

But many women come to me wanting big results fast, yet don’t have the time or financial resources to engage in working with me for months.  And working with me in a group setting doesn’t give them the personalization or jump start that they want and need.

In light of this, and in remembering my own past Holiday Relationship Blues, I would like to invite you to experience a big Breakthrough in your dating & love life.  I’d like to personally teach you the steps that I took, once I decided I was ready for true love. 

Introducing… Love Life Breakthrough Day.

What I’m offering is an entire day devoted to getting brand-new, life-changing real results in your dating & love life.  This will be a private, personalized Jumpstart program to improve what you’re currently experiencing in your love life.

What’s possible in your Breakthrough Day is…

• Your True Love Road Map.  This unique Road Map will help you easily recognize who to date, who to avoid, who and what to let go of, and what you truly need and want in relationship. It will serve as the foundation for all your love life decisions.

• A Personalized Dating Assessment – I’ll help you figure out if you’re presenting yourself in the best possible way (online and offline), what isn’t working for you and what to do about it, and how to experience feeling attractive, open, and confident as you navigate the world of dating. (Whether you’re newly divorced and ready to get back into the game or been at it for awhile without great results.)

• A Magnetize Your Image Mini-Makeover -  We’ll look at your overall style & image, including the colors you wear and favorite go-to dating/social outfits AND transform you into feeling and being more uniquely beautiful, attractive and desirous not only to yourself, but to YOUR Mr. Right.

• Private, In-Person Love Life Coaching with Me – This entire day will be devoted to clearing the blocks to letting love into your life, you will be much more clear, confident & truly prepared for your true love to come in to your life, quickly & effortlessly.

• Special Lunch Dining Out - I’ll take you to one of my favorite gourmet restaurants for lunch, where you can choose to receive personalized coaching and dating insights on how to dine and date with confidence, style and authenticity.

• A fabulous goodie bag of my favorite love and relationship magnetizing tools, valuable gifts & resources that I only share with my private clients.

• Two follow-up Love Life Coaching Sessions, scheduled within 30 days of our work together to ensure your progress and provide the accountability that you want.

I have a maximum of three Love Life Breakthrough Days open in January, and I have so much fun planned for you because I absolutely love to dive-in and create amazing, big and FUN change in women’s love lives.

Doing this Breakthrough Day will require you to get a little out of your comfort zone in the best possible way in order to get new results. Yet you’ll feel like you’re hanging out with one of your best, wisest girlfriends while experiencing a very, very productive day.

The investment for this packaged session is $997.00 if you sign up within the next 30 days. You can choose between making one payment in full, or a convenient two-payment option. Either way, the full investment in your love life is due before your scheduled Breakthrough Day.

If you’d like to have a session with me to learn more, discuss what’s going on in your love life and find out if this is right for you – before saying yes – I absolutely understand. 

So here’s what I suggest: Click here to book an intro session with me for only $87.  You will automatically receive access to my online schedule to immediately choose a time that works for you. This is also my way of making sure I can be of help to you. While I sent this offer to everyone on my list, I can’t possibly accept everyone. Just like you, I like to be sure that my clients are a good fit for me and for them

And if you decide to move forward and experience the Love Life Breakthrough Day with me, you can apply your session investment to the payment option you choose, so it’s truly a win-win for you. 

Ready to get started?  Click here to book your Love Life Breakthrough Day. 

Here’s to finding true love in 2010 (if not sooner!),

Leslie

PS – I realize some of you may want to skip the intro session and book your Love Life Breakthrough Day right away. That’s no problem. Just book the session here and leave me a note that you’re ready for the breakthrough right away and I’ll move you to the front of the queue. Here’s that link again.  

 www.BeLoveSavvy.com

Love & Relationship Coach

Dear Savvy Woman,

I’m talking with many women who are looking for their Mr. Right.  One thing that I notice that’s in their way – in a BIG way – is that they are lacking BELIEF. 

Now, don’t be fooled by the simplicity here.  Yes, we hear these beliefs all the time. We all hear from people that we talk to and know in our lives (even if you don’t specialize in this area like I do)  that ‘it’s hard out there’….’relationships don’t last’….’it’s not possible to focus on my career AND be in a healthy, vibrant relationship’….’being single over X age takes WORK’….ETC.  

These are all BELIEFS.   And a belief is simply a thought that has been repetitive enough within someones mind and being that it has been more permanently ‘grooved’ into a belief, like a woodworker carves grooves design into a piece of work, with stroke after stroke of their knife.

What’s essential is to realize that :

1) You are always at CHOICE with what you BELIEVE to be true.

2) Doing everything that it takes to re-create & live into BELIEFS  that support what you DESIRE in your life is non-negotiable.  It’s a MUST.

The truth is, you will continually meet resistance when you have a conflict between something you DESIRE, and the BELIEFS that you hold relating to that desire.   This area of life, love and relationships, works just like health, wealth, or beauty.  If you desire to make a million dollars, yet you don’t truly believe that it’s possible for YOU, you will struggle, and meet resistance, and have a hell of a time attracting that million dollars into your life.   If you desire to feel truly beautiful, but you don’t believe that you are beautiful, you won’t feel, embody nor exude your beauty.

My work with clients involves having them look at themselves and what they are doing , surrounding themselves with, focusing on, etc to support the CHANGE  that they want in their life. This involves detoxing and re-creating their  BELIEFS.   Sure, they can take the right ‘actions’ : date online to meet new men, extend themselves socially as much as possible, up-level their look to feel new and attractive, and truly let go of their past.  BUT, if they are doing all of these things yet they DON”T believe it’s really gonna happen – it’s not going to – at least not as effortlessly as they wish it would.  It may start and stop, or rev up and then burn out quickly, but they will continue to struggle in this area and have a much slower & difficult time meeting their guy.

And let this inspire you, because the really cool thing is that this is a key that unlocks so much.   So, it’s time for a little tough-love ladies, from me to you.   I want you to have an amazing time in this experience of growth and change as you attract YOUR Mr. Right.   So, take inventory of what you are investing in all the time- what  beliefs you are holding. 

And if you’re local to SF, I’m hosting a FREE talk on Navigating the Holidays as you find YOUR Mr. Right, Sunday evening 12/6.   Save a seat, and relax as you experience a focused hour on why it’s so important to believe, and to feel MAGNETIC – especially this magical holiday season.  I can’t wait!  RSVP by clicking HERE.  

From my savvy heart to yours ~

Leslie

www.BeLoveSavvy.com

Dear Amazing Women,

If you’re on my newsletter list (you can receive it subscribing here: www.BeLoveSavvy.com/articles.htm) , you read that a few weeks ago I attended Ali Brown’s SHINE event in Las Vegas.  This was a group of 500+ entrepreneurs – mostly women – all gathered in one ballroom for 3 full days of inspiration, teaching, and networking.  

With my recent ‘Find YOUR MR. Right Breakthrough Session’ promo, I’ve been meeting even more women ready for LOVE.  New love. Different love. They’re ready for a road they haven’t been down before.  As I’ve been consulting with these great women, I’ve been reminded of my biggest learning’s at SHINE.  Who knew?  Love & Entrepreneurship have a lot in common.

* ** Make Decisions based on where you want to be, not where you are (or where you’ve been). 

This is a biggie.  Entrepreneurs become afraid to invest more at times.  They’re looking at what’s worked so far.  Women seeking love are the same.  Many women are looking at their track record, their hurts, or their current status – and making decisions from that place, rather than based on their Vision.

*** If you are being your authentic self, you really can’t have competition.

Yeeessss.  This one is SO important ladies. I hear clients talk about comparison all the time, and as women, we all do this – I believe more than men.  If I sat and compared myself to other experts in my field, I would feel deflated and uninspired.  I may try to not be ME, but more like THEM, if I was feeling insecure or dis-believing.  As a woman, the more you own and harness your own personality, your own authentic beauty - and play up your strengths, the RIGHT man for you will be effortlessly drawn to you.  Comparison DOES kill. 

* ** People won’t invest in you beyond what you’ve invested in yourself.

As a coach, I continually invest in my own growth, tools and training.  I continually make financial investments in myself via coaches, teachers, trainings, seminars - not to mention the investment of time, and self-care.  I could never expect to receive an investment from a client for one of my coaching packages, products or seminars that I don’t make myself.  It’s an integrity thing.

How does this show up in LOVE?  Would you want to date you?  And are you in integrity in general with how you treat others?  Once a client came to me  being very tough on the guys out there, yet she was ultra-sensitive to any form of rejection that SHE received. It was amazing to watch her transform in our work together and soften into more acceptance of others & herself – and receive love.  Like attracts Like, so the more you invest in your own care, happiness and life – the more you will receive in the form of a wonderful partner.

Wishing you a fabulous Friday & weekend ahead.

From my savvy heart to yours ~

Leslie

www.BeLoveSavvy.com

Dear Savvy Woman,

Tip # 4 ~  Always play an honest game of cards without revealing your entire hand

I notice in the dating process – and I was guilty of it too – is that women (and men!) sometimes tend to either show their entire hand by date 4 - ‘I want to be married by X date,  2.5 kids in which the names are already picked by the way, I have a funny habit about X, and I feel really insecure about you going on that boys trip next month’ – or keep their cards so tight to the vest, and cheat through the game, that they repel and sabotage the organic and necessary flow of getting to know someone, and the opportunity to sink into a healthy relationship.  Learning to be somewhere in the middle ensures that you won’t, as Dr. Phil says, risk more than you’re willing to lose, and yet still get – and stay – in the ‘game’.

The more that you listen and trust yourself, the easier it is to navigate this process.

As a beautiful card that I once bought myself says, “Listen from within.  Your heart knows the way.”

xo,

Leslie

www.BeLoveSavvy.com

Dear Savvy Woman,

Here’s today’s tip in this blog series on dating & relating:

Tip #3 ~  Get – and Date – Out of Your Comfort Zone !

I use to have a ‘type’ that I seemed to date more of (dark hair, eyes, skin = ‘exotic’). Naturally friends thought that I would end up with someone like that, but I didn’t necessarily believe that. I didn’t know what my partner/husband would look like, but I started to get clear about what we would FEEL like together as a couple – the qualities that our relationship, and he, would embody.

Where I began to find more ease, freedom and fun in my dating life was the months leading up to meeting Larry (my hubby), where I began to date out of my comfort zone. When I let go of expectations and any ‘rules’, and made my priority having fun and learning something about myself and the dating process as I went along, it was way more enjoyable for me, no matter what the outcome.   Deciding to become more OPEN doesn’t mean not having personal standards, but it does mean re-examining some unrealistic – and outdated – beliefs and behaviors that aren’t serving you.

If you have a comfort zone to either your ‘type’ that you date, or the way that you go about meeting men, force yourself to step out of it.  As long as you know your essentials like attraction, connection, kindness,trust, respect, humor - realize that you just don’t KNOW the how  of- or some of the what –  the package will show up. 

Consider:

1) Letting yourself see if there’s chemistry in person that you might not sense online. Open up your age range. I have a friend who’s pregnant with her husband who is 22 years her senior, who has two grown children from his first marriage.  After 8 years of marriage, they are one of the most adventurous, happy and – sexy – couples that I know.

2) Don’t stay home when a friend invites you to a seemingly more ‘couples’ event, if that’s your typical M.O.   You never know who’s going to be there, or who might have available friends that they want you to meet.  Just like we benefit from mixing up our professional circles (I learn so much studying other businesses and networking outside my industry), be sure to mix up your personal time as to where and how you spend it!

3) Expect to be surprised – in a lot of good ways – in this process! 

Love,

Leslie

www.BeLoveSavvy.com

Dear Savvy Woman,

We can all wonder if we’re learning what we’re suppose to be learning on this journey in life.   I know for myself, sometimes it feels like I’m not learning when I’m stuck in a pattern and I’m wondering ‘where it is’ if it’s a manifestation, or, when I seemingly take steps backward and find myself in a ‘situation’ that’s undesirable.

The thing is, the soul doesn’t go backwards.  Our soul accumulates our life experiences, and although from the ‘outside’, it might appear that we’re slipping backwards, our soul knows.  Our soul has a life map, which includes some contract agreements with others, and experiences in life that we’re meant to have in this lifetime.

Talking with a savvy woman recently, she was looking at a love that was no longer and looking deeply at the fact that it seemed as if ‘He’ was a soul mate.  A Soul Love.  And so if so, now what?  Understanding that we come into this lifetime with soul contracts and that we learn from everyone, and everything, I offerred her the perspective and truth that the soul doesn’t go backward.  That despite it feeling like ‘he was it’ and the pain seems unbareable, there IS a greater plan.  

Sometimes we’re in so much pain we’re not ready to receive this, and this falls on deaf ears.  She was able to receive this, she already knew.  But it was helpful to her, she said, to be reminded of this Truth.  This Truth can be the net that catches you when you’re falling into the seemingly dark abyss.  The beauty here, is that if you can lean into this Truth more, it allows you to loosen the ‘where is it’ or ‘why’ grip more, and you become increasingly Present in the moment and to your life.  More and more possibility and opportunity live in this special place.

Then, next time around, the relationship, the job you take, the experience you have with someone’s illness – whatever the situation be – you bring to it the richness of your soul’s knowing.  And as always is the case, eventually you can *see* the ‘why’ that your heartache, or pain, or denial didn’t allow you to see at the time.  That is, if you are awake to your soul and to the greater unfolding of your life, some of which was already mapped out before you were born.

Isn’t it amazing?

Lots of love,

Leslie

www.BeLoveSavvy.com

Dear Savvy Woman,

Continued from Part 1, this is the mock-conversation between Jane and John.

Me (Jane) : I’ve noticed that we seem to not plan our time together as well these days (and it’s making me CRAZY – but i’m not going to say that part).  I want to be sure I can see you on weekends, and yet also not miss opportunities to see friends.  I’m wondering, how would it work for you (notice there’s no force to control or command) if we check in Tue or Wed in the week and see what’s up for the weekend?

John: Yeah, sure – of course.  I’m sorry. I know I’ve been last-minute lately – I’ve just been all-consumed at work.  I want to be spending time with you.

Me (Jane): That’s OK, I could tell, and yet I also know myself, and I don’t want to this to get in the way of our relationship. (This shows respect and kindness  toward him AND also subtly and powerfully declares what’s important to her, and what she won’t put up with!)

John: I don’t either – you are too special and I want to make sure you’re happy!

Now, the alternative that my client felt a knee-jerk to do (and I SO get it, I’ve done it myself) – due to feeling both defensive and rejected – was to book time with friends and make herself unavailable.  This at times can be called for – not so much to play games but to make sure you are investing in your friendships and making plans so you don’t resent him when he doesn’t ask to see you Friday night, or beyond.

Jane is very invested in the relationship – they already have conversations about living together and weddings – so the choice for her to make that would guarantee growth for herself and the relationship was to communicate in a way that was both authentic to her and respectful of her man.  Although she felt she’d get some reward from a ‘sting’ back to him as she felt slightly hurt and neglected, she decided to approach the conversation honoring her needs but not coming from a blaming or nagging place – neither being very attractive or sexy.

Here’s a  review of the How’s:  

• Ask if it’s a good time to talk
• Address what you need by claiming what it is, without any blame, threats or drama – and offering up a solution
• Approach with a positive and self-posessed energy – you are loving, kind and UNAPPOLOGETIC in the conversation

Why it’s Sexy & Attractive:

• It’s clean, clear and drama-free
• Men DO appreciate solutions and guidance on what makes their woman happy- this makes it EASY for them to deliver!
• Being honest and direct about what you need & want shows CONFIDENCE – very, very SEXY!
• Using kindness and not manipulation preserves their self-respect and respect in your eyes

It can take a little courage and vulnerabilty - depending on the situation or state – but it’s well, well worth it.   And you can’t lose – if it’s ill-received, it only shows you more about the person you’re spending time and energy on.  Valuable all the way around!

From my savvy heart to yours~

Leslie

The Savvy Woman’s Love Coach

www.BeLoveSavvy.com