Dear Savvy Woman,

This holiday, I’ll be visiting my family in the East Bay with my husband Larry, and then Christmas morning we’ll do stockings (love stockings!) & have brunch with friends before heading to ice skate – a fun new tradition of ours – at the outdoor rink in downtown SF.

But it wasn’t always this way.

It wasn’t that long ago that I was really struggling in dating & relationships.

I can remember one particular Christmas I rushed from celebrations with my family to hurry back to the city to meet up with my then boyfriend. We were going to have a special lunch and gift-exchange.  I handed him 5 gifts to his one for me, after which he scooted out to quickly deliver gifts to some friends visiting from out-of-town, without so much as an invitation to join him. 

I sat on his couch, fighting back tears as I waited for him to return, feeling so pathetic. I longed to be in a relationship where I didn’t have to fight for adoration, respect – or introductions on Christmas Day.

Sadly, it took me well over 6 more months before I finally decided I’d had enough of that. One day I summoned up the courage to stop the endless cycle of disappointing relationships and start doing things differently.

I started by reading a gazillion relationship books, going to seminars and let me tell you, weeding out all the fluff wasn’t easy. But in time I did find the gems and started getting better results in my love life. Most importantly I finally began to understand that dating & relationships could be so much more than what I’d ever believed to be possible.
 
Soon I began to experience an entirely new love life full of ease, fun, and a feeling of being much more in-control. Not long after my new mindset and improved self-confidence, I met the love of my life and now husband, Larry.

I’m sharing this with you because I don’t think it needs to take YOU that long.  In fact, you do not have to read a gazillion relationship books or go to countless seminars (I’ve done it for you!). Nor do you need to spend years trying to figure out why you haven’t found Mr. Right.

I have designed my own 7 step system for finding true love based on all of my experience and the simple, authentic dating strategies that empower you.

As a Love and Relationship Coach, I help women who are ready for a fulfilling relationship find true love. I work exclusively with women who are ready to do things differently and get better results in their dating and love life. I help them make better choices in men (no more repeating the same patterns!), date with confidence and fun, and how to ultimately find true love.

But many women come to me wanting big results fast, yet don’t have the time or financial resources to engage in working with me for months.  And working with me in a group setting doesn’t give them the personalization or jump start that they want and need.

In light of this, and in remembering my own past Holiday Relationship Blues, I would like to invite you to experience a big Breakthrough in your dating & love life.  I’d like to personally teach you the steps that I took, once I decided I was ready for true love. 

Introducing… Love Life Breakthrough Day.

What I’m offering is an entire day devoted to getting brand-new, life-changing real results in your dating & love life.  This will be a private, personalized Jumpstart program to improve what you’re currently experiencing in your love life.

What’s possible in your Breakthrough Day is…

• Your True Love Road Map.  This unique Road Map will help you easily recognize who to date, who to avoid, who and what to let go of, and what you truly need and want in relationship. It will serve as the foundation for all your love life decisions.

• A Personalized Dating Assessment – I’ll help you figure out if you’re presenting yourself in the best possible way (online and offline), what isn’t working for you and what to do about it, and how to experience feeling attractive, open, and confident as you navigate the world of dating. (Whether you’re newly divorced and ready to get back into the game or been at it for awhile without great results.)

• A Magnetize Your Image Mini-Makeover -  We’ll look at your overall style & image, including the colors you wear and favorite go-to dating/social outfits AND transform you into feeling and being more uniquely beautiful, attractive and desirous not only to yourself, but to YOUR Mr. Right.

• Private, In-Person Love Life Coaching with Me – This entire day will be devoted to clearing the blocks to letting love into your life, you will be much more clear, confident & truly prepared for your true love to come in to your life, quickly & effortlessly.

• Special Lunch Dining Out - I’ll take you to one of my favorite gourmet restaurants for lunch, where you can choose to receive personalized coaching and dating insights on how to dine and date with confidence, style and authenticity.

• A fabulous goodie bag of my favorite love and relationship magnetizing tools, valuable gifts & resources that I only share with my private clients.

• Two follow-up Love Life Coaching Sessions, scheduled within 30 days of our work together to ensure your progress and provide the accountability that you want.

I have a maximum of three Love Life Breakthrough Days open in January, and I have so much fun planned for you because I absolutely love to dive-in and create amazing, big and FUN change in women’s love lives.

Doing this Breakthrough Day will require you to get a little out of your comfort zone in the best possible way in order to get new results. Yet you’ll feel like you’re hanging out with one of your best, wisest girlfriends while experiencing a very, very productive day.

The investment for this packaged session is $997.00 if you sign up within the next 30 days. You can choose between making one payment in full, or a convenient two-payment option. Either way, the full investment in your love life is due before your scheduled Breakthrough Day.

If you’d like to have a session with me to learn more, discuss what’s going on in your love life and find out if this is right for you – before saying yes – I absolutely understand. 

So here’s what I suggest: Click here to book an intro session with me for only $87.  You will automatically receive access to my online schedule to immediately choose a time that works for you. This is also my way of making sure I can be of help to you. While I sent this offer to everyone on my list, I can’t possibly accept everyone. Just like you, I like to be sure that my clients are a good fit for me and for them

And if you decide to move forward and experience the Love Life Breakthrough Day with me, you can apply your session investment to the payment option you choose, so it’s truly a win-win for you. 

Ready to get started?  Click here to book your Love Life Breakthrough Day. 

Here’s to finding true love in 2010 (if not sooner!),

Leslie

PS – I realize some of you may want to skip the intro session and book your Love Life Breakthrough Day right away. That’s no problem. Just book the session here and leave me a note that you’re ready for the breakthrough right away and I’ll move you to the front of the queue. Here’s that link again.  

 www.BeLoveSavvy.com

Love & Relationship Coach

Dear Savvy Woman,

On the road to attracting your beloved - boyfriend, partner, or husband – there’s a process of shedding.  Sometimes it’s an organic process of conscious elimination of what we already know to be true based on past experience.  For example, in my twenties I seemed to find myself in relationships with men that I somehow ended up needing to fix or control.  They seemed to be a few steps ‘behind’ me in life, in a literal sense.  As I entered my late twenties and early thirties, I was very conscious of desiring a relationship where I felt more challenged and ‘called forth’ to be a bigger and better person by my partner.  

Sometimes we are not aware of what needs to be shed from our life in order to attract in what we desire, in this case, YOUR Mr. Right.  This is one reason why working with a mentor or coach pays incredible dividends.  Many clients have these incredible ‘Ah-ha!’s with me when we dive in, because we look at other areas of their life where there are less-than  desired results, or struggle, and we identify common denominators that require attention – and  change. They’re often very surprised that things are as connected as they are.  Shedding is being called – and it’s often not directly related with what is perceived to be related to love, dating, and relating.   As soon as something is eliminated – a behavior, a belief, a person, an attachment – room opens up for NEW - aliveness, good energy, growth – relationship.

As you desire YOUR Mr. Right, become more and more curious about what may need to shed within you, or within your life.  The most important step in this process is to take action despite whatever fears or doubts come up.  The Universe responds to action, and OFTEN it’s the actions that are not easily SEEN, but will be FELT and known by YOU (eliminating a limiting belief, a change in how you feel internally, etc.) that are the wham, shazam!..actions that change your life.

From my savvy heart to yours ~

Leslie

www.BeLoveSavvy.com

Dear Savvy Woman,

“If a man that you want isn’t coming toward you, it might be time to grieve, but it is certainly not the time to be reaching for his lapels”. - Unknown

This was a quote that I use to carry around with me as I was desiring MY Mr. Right, yet sensing that something was off with the way I was being.  I didn’t want to admit this to myself years ago when I was in a relationship that wasn’t working out, let alone admit it to anyone else.  Eventually I decided that I needed to let go of this particular guys lapels, and move on. But what I didn’t realize at the time was that I was holding on to WAY more than just this man’s lapels. 

I meet many women desiring THEIR Mr. Right in my work as a mentor and coach, and often these women are not currently in a relationship holding on, but *they’re grasping their own ’lapels’ of regret and false beliefs*.  These women are letting  things like false beliefs (’It’s not possible for me’ …’I've missed my window’ …’I blew it so I’ll blow it again’), or attachment to their past hold them back.  As a mentor once reminded me, ‘what you authentically want, wants you back’. 

There IS a ‘Mr. Right’, perfect for YOU.  Question is, do you believe this?  And are you willing to let go of some important things that may be closing you off from connecting with him?

Here’s an example : ‘Shelly’ thinks she’s really super available - doing all the ’right things’ , including spending countless hours online dating - but  - things don’t seem to stick with any one guy and so this experience just cements a belief that maybe it’s ‘not gonna happen’, or that she needs to move cities.  She thinks she’s doing all the right things, and she feels hopeless.  Unfortunately, the truth is that Shelly isn’t open, self-accepting, nor is she internally relaxed in this dating process, so the EASE, fun and confidence that she craves - and is SO magnetic to men - isn’t there.

See, we have to ‘forget the past and forget the future’, in order to calm our minds, ease our souls, and be present to our greatest dreams and deepest desires - and allow them to begin to speak to us, to unfold before us.  And there are some easy steps to doing this. I took these very steps myself, and it not only allowed me to effortlessly meet  & connect to my now husband, Larry - after many years of struggle - but it’s forever changed the way I approach life.

If you are a woman who wants to feel confident, supported and light as you look for YOUR Mr. Right,  learn more about my private and group work here: www.BeLoveSavvy.com.  I want to help you meet YOUR Mr. Right.

Have a great weekend…

From my savvy heart to yours~

Leslie

www.BeLoveSavvy.com

Dear Savvy Woman,

My work with clients often has a component to it of helping them do things differently - largely, it’s about doing things differently (we all need guidance from those that have been there before as we step out, I know I do).  As they say in the famous definition of insanity, something to : doing the same things the same way and expecting different results.

The other night I went to the bookstore and rather than hunting down some books I had on my list to read, I just let myself browse. After all, I was in a bookstore to do that, and not just clicking through on Amazon.com to get what I needed.  And I mention this for a reaon, as there is such a gift to just watching where our attention and energy takes us rather than always being on a mission and ‘following guidelines’ = in this case, picking up certain books.  It lets you play more, and be creative and open.

So that night I stumbled on the book Personal Power through Awareness (Sanya Roman).  And I want to share with you something extremely important about your future, that she writes about. I just sent a newsletter yesterday (are you signed up?  www.BeLoveSavvy.com/articles.htm) on this topic as it’s been up for a lot of my clients  - and for all of us in the world at this time especially, I think. 

“Every time you think of the future you project energy into it, even if you mumble, ” I never get things done,” or “I don’t know why this happened to me,” or “I wish I hadn’t done it.” Every comment you make is directing energy towards the past, the present or the future. If you could become aware of even one hundredth of the thoughts you are sending out into the future, and evolve them, within a month you would know delight that exceeds all of your pictures (in your mind) today. Every single statement you make about yourself, to a friend or even to yourself becomes a truth. You project energy at every moment. If you want a better future, speak of it, picture it, say it to others. Only you can create for yourself what you want. It is the greatest power, honor and gift you have ever been given.”

To your love & success,

Leslie

www.BeLoveSavvy.com

Dear Savvy Woman,

If you’re inspired and affirmed by Astrology and Intuitive & Soulful resources such as Archetypes, you must ’meet’ Robert Ohotto if you don’t already know him.   A friend mentioned him to me years ago, he has a weekly radio show on HayHouseRadio.com, and he gives amazing personal readings.

Here is some sage Truth from Robert below that’s very applicable to what I work with women to achieve: a strong and loving relationship with themselves (that gets reflected back to them via their relationships and overall quality of life).

“None of us are defined by the mistakes of our past unless we believe we are. What defines us is what we’ve learned from them. Don’t let shame keep you hostage to what you’ve done. Love yourself — give up your old story lines and breathe in the present moment freedom of claiming your highest potential. You are worthy of being renewed.”

-Robert Ohotto

Here is to loving ourselves and being RENEWED~

Leslie

www.BeLoveSavvy.com

Dear Savvy Friend,

Discomfort is a signal to us that we’re on to something…

“Your discomfort is actually a gift from G*d.  The Universe is reminding you that there is something you believe in more than what you are currently doing, and it is steering you to your right place.  Your Higher Self is giving you clues toward the prize that awaits you when you remember your worth.  There is something that you believe in, and that is the direction in which you need to move to find real happiness.  In contrast to the sense of struggle that you experience when you deny your gifts, you will be amazed at how effortlessly and joyfully success comes to you when you step toward your heart’s chosen field.  We never have to deny our self in order to win.”

- Alan Cohen, Dare to Be Yourself

I’ve been more and more uncomfortable recently as I’ve been in a deeper place of personal and professional growth.  I decided to become more aware of when I eat sugar, and to modify that behavior (it’s rough but rewarding! ;-), and a little won’t kill me…).  I’ve been uncomfortable as I take steps to honor my needs, despite how those around me may respond.  I’ve been uncomfortable as I step into new-to-me actions leading me toward my desires.

If we aren’t growing, we’re not fully living.  And growth is uncomfortable at times.

We can get to these plateaus and rest for a while, taking in the vistas.  But then we realize the person we’re dating or in relationship with isn’t perhaps one we should continue to be with.  We decide that we can’t stomach one more toxic conversation with someone.  Or, we listen to that inner knowing enough that’s nudging us to interview in an entirely new field -  one that’s lighting us up.

Life can get a bit uncomfortable as we listen to ourselves, honor what we’re hearing, and take actions based on faith, not fear.

So, here is to loving ourselves through the discomfort.

On the other side is peace. And *bliss*.

With love,

Leslie

www.BeLoveSavvy.com

Dear Savvy Woman,

BTW, although ’savvy’ can be synonymous with ’shrewd’, I chose it in my brand for another synonymous word, ‘understanding’.  A savvy woman has understanding.  A savvy woman understands that to ‘be love’ is to receive love. To love oneself and look within transforms what one experiences on the outside.

That was on my mind - thanks to a tweet on Twitter from someone picking it apart, which helped me - and wanted to share.

Ok, so on to Inviting Your Beloved In.  This subject comes from my ‘advice column’ (if you have a question, send it to my assistant at assist@belovesavvy.com, and I’ll answer you here in my blog!), where a savvy woman wrote to me about my opinion on FWB, knowing as she had read, that I don’t promote a FWB relationship as helpful if you’re ready for your beloved.

Dear Leslie,

….I have a question: why exactly is it so crucial to cut of FWB? I read in one of your recent newsletters that that is one of the important steps to take in manifesting my life partner.

I have an ex-boyfriend who is basically my best friend. We talk or email nearly every day and support each other in dating other people/editing our profiles, etc. He’s been so helpful for me in demystifying the man’s perspective. We completely love each other as friends and human beings, and we have sex once in a while in a really loving and respectful way….

Thanks so much!!

“Beth”

Dear “Beth”,

I’m glad you wrote, because I know this is a topic that many can relate to.  I’m going to communicate what has been true in my own experience, as well as what many may agree with - yet you and others may not.  So, I’ll speak for what’s worked for me and many women that I know.

You must make room for your beloved in your life, as if he’s already here.  Feng Shui experts suggest placing a nightstand on the other side of the bed for him.  Similar to that physical representation of a ‘welcome’ mat in your bedroom, there must be a big, bold ‘welcome’ mat in your heart and in your energy-field. 

Now, perhaps you are a unique woman who feels after sleeping with this Ex (which I don’t classify as a ’FWB’ -friends with benefits- it’s an Ex) you feel empowered to go out and meet other men, and you feel more open & available for connection with other men than if you didn’t have this relationship with, let’s call him, Eric. 

Most women in your shoes can’t separate (I know I couldn’t, as much as I would fool myself. Eventually the love-high wore, and the hangover would settle in).  They may not be conscious of it , but in some way, shape or form, the ‘Erics’ in their lives take up space.  The coaster and glass of water, watch, and cell phone are on the ‘guest’ nightstand - and your beloved wonders, ‘Who’s here?’. 

Beleive me, I’m not saying you need to remain celebate and not enjoy the pleasure of male energy and company. But it needs to be ‘clean’ energy.  I don’t like FWB - or Ex’s -because they’re not ‘clean’.  Are they a friend, or are they a lover? Are they someone you once and/or now wanted more from? In your case, it’s an Ex, which is more than a friend if you’re in intimate emotional and physcial contact (which you are currently in both).

I’m a huge advocate for taking a lover, if you stay hyper-conscious of keeping it ‘clean’.  A lover with no strings.  A lover who is not a friend, who you didn’t once date and get to know more intimately and mundanely - no strings.  Somone who remains ‘clean’ in your life, aka, doesn’t socialize with you or your friends, doesn’t court or date you, and doesn’t spend the night and use the nightstand.  Sound rigid? I’m sure.  But this form of relationship doesn’t take up ANY space other than some physical intimacy -which - in and of itself is cause for most women to form attachment and bonds to - typically prematurely and inappropriately so. 

When I read your email, Beth, I immediately wondered why you and Eric aren’t together and committed - the way you desire for with a beloved - based on your description of your relationship as it is today.  If either or both of you have long decided that it’s a NO, then you must get really honest with yourself here.  As difficult as it is, we often hold on in a seemingly harmless way, when truly the person we love (and can continue to love, as love never dies) we need to let go of - the form of relationship needs to change.  Many of us fool ourselves into believing that because we don’t have a ‘boyfriend’ or ‘husband’, and that the form with an Ex has changed somewhat, we’re truly available to our beloved (who is on his way to you) - when we’re not.  The water is muddied, the lines are a bit blurred.  We’re afraid to ‘burn the ships’ because what if our Beloved - another ship - doesn’t come?

My advice: stop sleeping with Eric immediately, and think about taking  month break from contact, being really honest as to why.  Try it out.  Notice what you miss.  Take exquisite care of yourself. Reach out to others. After a month, what’s there? What’s there for Eric?  If you are not to be together as partners, you need to be prepared to grieve this form of the relationship, give space for it to change,  and roll out a bigger welcome mat for your Beloved.

With love and understanding,

Leslie

www.BeLoveSavvy.com

Dear Savvy Woman,

There’s simply not enough of us telling our story of success - to ourselves -  and then to our world.  

Often we hear ourselves (yours truly included at times) and others talking about what’s NOT happening, why it isn’t, and how much we don’t want more of  what is or ‘THAT!’.   It’s the stream of subtle and not so subtle negativity, and it’s  SO not ATTRACTION-rich for dating,  love, relationships, or success in life.

Remember, the very powerful Universal Law of Attraction can be defined as,”Things of like vibration are drawn.”  Like attracts like.  And vibration is transmitted -  like radio waves - when you’re tuned in to a station.  If you’re on AM 840, you’re not going to be able to listen to FM 97.3, are you? 

I work with clients to educate and mentor on just how important this ‘Telling Your Story’ is for success in love and in life.   In *anything* that you want to create.   

See, we are all living our story - our attraction - right now.  What is in our life *right now* was once a thought, and then it formed a belief, and it formed and held a vibration that then matched and attracted everything that we currently are experiencing.  Tell me, do you like - and love - what you’re living? 

So, what story do you want to tell?   What’s your Story of Success?  Write it down.  Vision it.  Begin to talk about it.  By doing these things, you’ll begin to LIVE IT.  People, circumstances, inclinations, hunches - all will attract to you. 

I partner with women to help them begin to tell and live into their NEW story, creating new results in love - in relationship - and in their lives.  In late July,  I’ll be hosting a special live RETREAT  that I can’t wait to send out more details on very soon!  At a very beautiful location, we’ll spend the day together focusing on what will create for you the life and love of your dreams.  No more struggle. No more holding patterns.  The retreat, along with some follow-up to tele-classes,  will teach you the process that changed my own life and those of the clients that I’ve worked with.   

For more details on this upcoming event or how to get started working with me,  you may write to assistant@belovesavvy.com.  

Here’s to your successful story-telling. ;-)

Lots of love,

Leslie

www.BeLoveSavvy.com

Dear Savvy Woman,

Are you ready to make a L-E-A-P?

If you’re single , don’t miss my tele-class happening TONIGHT:

3 Key Steps to ATTRACT Real Love

These steps will not only make you feel more confident - no matter where you are in the process - but they’ll help you SAVE TIME and bring more EASE to dating and relating.   I promise. 

Not single?  Unless you’re in utopia (which we know is never a permanent state), call in and discover that you can apply these keys over and over again to make YOU and your relationship ROCK even more.  

Time:  5pm Pacific,  7pm Central, 8pm Eastern

Call #:   218.339.4600

Access Code:  264593#

Talk soon!

Leslie

www.BeLoveSavvy.om

PS. Got Questions?  Please post them here or contact me to get them answered here or on the call.

Dear Savvy Woman,

I’ve been receiving your requests for addressing topics, so I’m adding a feature to my regular newsletter (are you signed up?  go here: www.BeLoveSavvy.com/articles.htm and sign up now). Please send me your questions!  ’Anna’ below, wrote about addressing Jealousy & Resentment, and just in case she’s not on my list (Anna, I hope you are!), I’m posting my response where I know she’ll see it.

Dear Leslie,

…I feel like I’ve been so disappointed and almost resentful of the experiences that I’ve had with men in my recent past. I want to let go of the bitterness and jealousy that I know is poisoning my mind and body, but I find it so difficult to get past certain experiences that have left that bad taste in my mouth.  I find myself thinking about my previous relationship, jealous of his new found love. Find myself unsatisfied with my “friends with benefits”. Resentful that he won’t give me what I’m looking for, and even worse, that he has me in a queue with a number of different women…

Thank you so much for your words,

‘Anna’

Dear ‘Anna’,

I can feel your pain, and, I can also feel the anger you hold toward yourself that’s underneath.  I’m going to cut to the chase: whenever we hold resentment towards another, we’re only holding ourselves hostage – NOT them. It’s a victim stance, which will only attract more opportunities that allow you to continue playing ‘victim’ - which I know is not  what you want to create in your life.  Jealousy is like eating a refined-carb breakfast, where as Envy is protein-rich. Jealousy is a toxic emotion and drains your energy, where as Envy is a healthy indicator of desire: something that you yourself want to have, do or be.  And – the very cool thing is - you won’t authentically desire what you aren’t able to experience for yourself!  Here are some transformative steps to take that will un-clutter your heart and mind, and move you forward:

1)      Decide. Decide to let go and forgive. Forgive yourself.  Forgive your ex.  Forgive your FWB. Forgive everyone. Write it all out, anything  & everything that you’re feeling and holding on to.  Then burn it (safely) and toss it. This ritual shows both you and the Universe that you’re clear, decisive, and ready.

2)     Burn the ships = Cut off your FWB’s. They’re taking up precious space and the relationships are making you feel like crap – far from feeling honored, adored, respected and cherished.

3)     Love yourself up! Take a minimum of 21 days (makes a habit).  Cocoon yourself  with daily gestures that authentically soothe, like:  baths, flowers, walks, music, candles, dark chocolate, a good cry, a nice glass of wine, morning affirmations, delicious tea, good girl-time, a new lipstick. This changes your energy while creating excellent self-care.

Believe. And Trust. Trust in the greater good - what’s in divine design for YOU – because it’s unfolding, always.  Please stay in touch and let us know how you loved yourself up!

With love,

Leslie

www.BeLoveSavvy.com

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