Dear Savvy Woman,

One of the ‘tenants’ in Being Love Savvy is to be gracious with Compliments.

Graciously accept.  Take.  Allow in.  And, give - generously.

Let’s start with RECEIVING compliments.  We as women can really struggle with receiving compliments.   I know that I do.   I use to think that I didn’t struggle a whole lot with this.  I think my ego wanted me to think this to be true, but , deep down, it would be tough to simply take in a compliment.   I found that in the areas where I held myself hostage to perfection, or just to very high expectations, I would struggle receiving those ‘that is GREAT, Leslie’ - or - ’good job!’.   My impulse would be to dismiss it.   After some work on my part towards loving myself enough to begin to buy in and believe, a small voice from deep within me would reply ,  ‘Really?’, if at least to myself.   I aspire to,  and sometimes succeed, with a smile and simple, ‘Thank you.’  

Receiving compliments graciously is SO important, my savvy friends.  Why?  Because it is an indicator for yourself that there’s some self-love, self-acceptance going on inside.  And if you aren’t loving and accepting of yourself, it’s very difficult to take in a compliment.  And, what happens next: it will be tough for anyone else to love you, and have you receive that love on an authentic level.  As Marianne Williamson writes in A Return To Love, “Nothing that is alien to our system can enter into us and stay there for long…if I swallow a piece of aluminum foil, my body will regurgitate until the offending object is expelled.  If I’m convinced that I’m not good enough, I will have a difficult time accepting someone into my life who thinks I am.”

And what about giving compliments?    Don’t you feel good when you give someone a compliment?  It’s just like the concept of giving gifts - it always feel so great to give someone a gift.  And the best ones are the suprise, no-reason-but-just-felt-like-it-kind.   And compliments work the same way.  I especially love complimenting people that I don’t know - a stranger.  It’s a wonderful way to extend ourselves and be generous.

And the receiving and giving of compliments is simply a ‘feel good’.   And ‘feel goods’ are really important.   They improve our thoughts, feelings and beliefs: the three things that contribute to our energetic ‘vibration’ = what we attract.

From my savvy heart to yours,

Leslie

The Savvy Woman’s Love Coach

www.BeLoveSavvy.com

Dear Savvy Woman,

I can’t resist….my Monday morning ritual before I loose myself in emails, writing or phone calls is to ………da da na na:   CHECK MY WEEKLY HOROSCOPE!    Ahhhh….ok, I said it!  I’m out. 

Well, if you follow my blog you’ve come across this before, but here’s the link to my favorite source:   http://www.shirleymaclaine.com/articles/astrology/article-341

This week, it’s all about…

This is a wonderful week to reaffirm your commitment to all that brings you into greater harmony with your spiritual self. Meditation is very gratifying as it is easy to attune and perceive. Visualization is easy so make a list of those things you wish manifested in your life, and as the lunar tide swells toward the full Moon on July 18 you will be aided by its growing energy.

The second quarter cycle beginning on Thursday in Libra shows you where you need to bring into alignment anything that has been out of kilter. You can now either eliminate what isn’t right and working or make a shift so balance is restored.

Remember, too, that the Dog Days, holy days in ancient Egypt, when the star, Sirius, was visible, began last week and will be active until August 6. We were all able to focus upon the great wisdom and knowledge when the Pleiadian Stargate opened last month and now we may meditate on the blessings coming from the Sirius system. By some, Sirius is thought to be our spiritual sun. For thousands of years it has been observed and considered significant. Wisdom and compassion, order, healing and divinity are just a few of the many blessings generated.

Believe and receive,

From my savvy heart to yours ~

Leslie

The Savvy Woman’s Love Coach

www.BeLoveSavvy.com

Dear Savvy Woman,

Getting ready for the day this morning, I looked in the mirror and thanked myself for getting my brows done yesterday.   Whenever I get them done, I feel a little more ‘together’ as I walk out the door, without having to spend a second longer in my morning ritual for it.

Little things like this I find can really help me raise my vibrational energy at times.  When I’m in  a low -vibe place, I’ll take whatever I can get. = )

True and infinite beauty comes from within, this I am sure of.   But a girls got a right to feel good on the outside!

So, if you haven’t had your brows shaped (and throw in some color while you’re at it!) before, I highly recommend it.

For you local SF gals, Erika Lee at Dermal Essentials in Cow Hollow is a pro.   After spending years at Benefit, she went out on her own :  http://dermalessentials.com.  

Go on, raise some brows!

From my savvy heart to yours,

Leslie

The Savvy Woman’s Love Coach

www.BeLoveSavvy.com

Dear Savvy Woman,

Keeping Your Word is one of the ‘tenants’ of Being Love Savvy.   It’s SO important.  I really can’t emphasize it enough.

And do you know who it’s most important to keep your word to?   No, not your guy.  Or your  mom.  Nope, not your best friend either.

TO YOURSELF. 

You see, when we keep our word to ourselves, we start to accrue feelings of WORTH, CONFIDENCE, BELIEF in ourselves, in our own ‘account’.

Our word can be small :  I’m going to workout 3 times this week….I’m going to save $X each week……I’m going to finish X project, before I begin X. 

Our word can be big:  I’m going to write a book.  I’m going to stop this sabatoging behavior.  I’m not going to sleep with him again.  I am going to change jobs.

And when we don’t, we slowly take out withdrawls.  They seem so small, so insignificant.  BUT,  before we know it, we are flat out BROKE.  Our account is empty.

We look at that shiny object we want to ‘ purchase ‘  (translation:  class to try,  conversation to have,  person to meet, adventure trip to try,  CHANGE to make),  and we don’t feel that we can, because our wallet feels barren.

When I coach my clients on changes that they want to make, we start small.   Baby steps.  Once we show ourselves that we’re in integrity, because we’re keeping our word to ourselves (getting in 3 workouts a week - eliminating some energy drains, etc),  SHIFT happens.   Confidence builds.  BOLD steps start to accumulate.   AMAZING, LIFE-CHANGING results take place.

And, take note, savvy sister:  a very important piece to this is to be kind and gentle with yourself.  When you don’t follow through with yourself, it’s OK.   You are NOT bad.  You are HUMAN.

So start SMALL.   Try keeping your word to yourself on the low hanging fruit first, before you climb the ladder and reach for the sky-high pieces.   

From my savvy heart to yours,

Leslie

The Savvy Woman’s Love Coach

www.BeLoveSavvy.com

Dear Savvy Woman,

I had such a fun weekend!  Two fun birthday-bash dinners for friends, one big hike in Marin, and a trip to the East Bay to spend some quality time with my Dad on Father’s Day.  Whew!   Come Sunday night, I was so exhausted, I rewarded myself after grocery shopping and dinner with back to back episodes of the new Denise Richards reality show (not sure if that’s a reward, but it felt indulgent). I stayed up way too late, which was part of the fun.

Aside from all the celebration this weekend, I got some distance for myself in two ways.  One, was getting some distance from my sweetie.  Larry was away to Chicago for the weekend to visit his family.  Don’t get me wrong, although we do argue and have tension from time to time like other couples, we parted in a very strong and loving place, and I knew that I would miss not having him as my handsome date and companion.   However, I warmed up to the weekend living as a ‘Single’ gal:  playing my music loud, giggling & empathisizing with girlfriends over delicious dinners, and taking as long as I wanted in the shower and in my closet, candles lit.  It was a sweet reminder of what life was like when I was Single and only had to concern myself with Me. 

Distance from being part of a couple, and from having my best friend and husband at my side, at home and out.   The other distance came from getting that distance.  The second layer of distance was at realizing that although I had this sweet reminder of what my Single life was like, I realized that I was a visitor there.  I am no longer that woman.  As I approach my one-year wedding anniversary, it was very syncronistic timing to get a new perspective on this awareness.

I’m writing about this because it served as a reminder to me that we all need to get some distance, from time to time, to hit refresh and get a taste of other perspectives.  It’s extremely healthy.  Life is every-changing and never static, although sometimes we struggle to make it so.   We resist the chapter turning, if at least for a moment.  We can fight to keep our same looks if we’re resisting aging, our old stories when we’re resisting change, our single-status when we’re resisting committment, our same friendships when we’re resisting outgrowing them, our non-parental status when we’re resisting children, etc etc etc. 

I encourage you to try getting some distance here and there, for yourself. 

• Force yourself to schedule alone time (this is REALLY hard when you’re madly in love, or lust, in the newness of dating or relationship, but even MORE important so as not to loose yourself completely). 
• Try out a new option (neighborhood, style of dressing, type of date, anything!)
• Mix things up where you feel very tied to routine or way of doing something, or way of being.
• Listen to that little voice that says, “I miss doing….,  I am craving……, I’d love to try……” and  just do it.

When you do, you’ll feel more alive, renewed and complete - right where you are.

From my savvy heart to yours,

Leslie

The Savvy Woman’s Love Coach

www.BeLoveSavvy.com

Dear Savvy Woman,

I was working with my coach yesterday (I have one too - we all need to walk our talk…) and she asked me how often I check in with my Vision (in this case, my career Vision) these days.

My answer = not much.

Admittedly, I can find myself off-track, and the thought of dedicating some time to connect to my Vision feels like - UGH.

Just like exercising, eating well, or other self-care, if I get off-track, it takes a little wake-up to stretch and get back into the game.   It might feel more comfortable to sit it out, but it’s no fun not playing.

I discovered in talking with Karin, my Fabulous Coach (www.mmmaven.com), that the best way for me to tap into my Vision regularly and effectively is by playing a mind movie.   

A mind movie is simply a Vision you hold in your mind, playing out the future scenario that you are desiring.   I first did this when I anxiously anticipated delivering a presentation to executives in a former job.  I pictured myself confident, calm and equiped to handle anything that came my way.   Sure enough, we oddly lost electricity during the event, and I later received praise from my boss for how unaffected I appeared.  

Mind movies work.  I’ve played them preparing for various events that caused me temporary anxiety (dates, interviews, key meetings, challenging conversations).  It never fails to work.

I committed to Karin yesterday to play my mind movie , at minimum, every day if just for a few minutes.  The key is to really feel into the movie, capturing the energy and vibration of your Vision.  Press pause and hold that space as long as you can in your mind, and feel that energy in your body.  

So, my savvy friend, I encourage you to try this.  You will be amazed.

First, get clear on a Vision.  What are you desiring?   Then, create a future image of you having this in your life, being this Future Self.  Add in details and feeling-tones that make the movie rich and fulfilling - you’re enjoying the fruits of your success.  

Play this movie regularly!

From my savvy heart to yours,

Leslie

The Savvy Woman’s Love Coach

www.BeLoveSavvy.com

Dear Savvy Woman,

I often coach my clients to journal.  This is not an easy task if you’re not accustomed to doing so - I know.   One thing that I always find is a help - both for myself and for my clients - is to begin with a Gratitude List.  I got this idea from a book that Oprah made famous, Simple Abundance, by Sara Ban Breathnach. 

The idea is to give thanks to what you have, what you enjoy, what is true.   Small and big.  Simple pleasures. 

Taking time to list these things can shift our perspecitve dramatically.   Suddenly, we realize that we have many things to take pleasure and comfort in.   We don’t need to keep our mental focus on what we seemingly lack or don’t have.

For example, my list today:

1.  Feeling the sun on my face and the warm air.

2. Laughing and making it through 6am bootcamp this morning.

3.  A sweet email from a friend I don’t get to see much.

4.  The ability to do work that I love today.

5.  A sweet kiss from my husband.

Writing this list drops me in to how I’m feeling, and slows me down to take notice of all that I am able to do and to experience.   Especially if I’m feeling uninspired or in negative thinking, writing 5 things to be grateful for always helps turn me around.  

Try it out!

From my savvy heart to yours,

Leslie

The Savvy Woman’s Love Coach

www.BeLoveSavvy.com

Dear Savvy Woman,

What if you knew that…..

• you are right where you are suppose to be , right this minute
• you can’t make a mistake, because there are none -life is comprised of continual lessons
• you only have control over yourself, and your reactions
• you are absolutely, purely, completely loved, as you are - always

Would you date differently?

Might you feel ….

• lighter, looser, and more accepting of YOU?
• more courageous to show up on dates and in relationship in a very true, bright and bold version of YOU?
• safe to explore desires, honor and develop boundaries, and express YOURSELF?
• LOVED?

Read this over again.  Feel into this.  Then, step into this on your next date, or if in relationship, your next interaction with your sweetie.  Slip into this mental state.  This is pure TRUTH.  This is WHAT IS.  We just forget.   And then we remember.   When we ACT from this place, it is pure BEAUTY and STRENGTH.   Soooooo LOVELY.   You get to  RELAX.   Watch what happens.

Ahhh…..

With love,

From my savvy heart to yours ~

Leslie

The Savvy Woman’s Love Coach

www.BeLoveSavvy.com

Stones & colors: Iridescent shades; metallic; light blue; light green stones of clear and dense properties

Oils & incenses: Patchouli; comfrey; dill; thyme; bay laurel; berries

Mercury and Neptune combined in retrograde motion calls for looking, not just back, but deep within, and, also beyond the mundane. Finding a link to the greater consciousness and a common denominator within humanity will help to open doors of evolution during these times.

Be reaching back and journeying, maybe through astral travel, you will find original intents and purposes of your spirit and collective soul groups. You are in a time now to have revealed to you the answers to many mysteries that have been veiled in time for centuries.

The truth and the wisdom are there and the time for it to emerge is now. Let this be your guiding force to a safer and more abundant and secure lifestyle.

From my savvy heart to yours,

Leslie

The Savvy Woman’s Love Coach

www.BeLoveSavvy.com

Dear Savvy Woman,

 I’m a little exhausted today. Yesterday, yours truly celebrated her 37th birthday.  Sure, why not, I’ll throw out the number.  I’m not afraid.  After all, it’s just a number.  It’s all of my life experiences rolled up into a big-small-in between number, whatever your perspective happens to be at the time that you look at it - right?

I had a wonderful day.  It was perfect. It was a combination of family and friends, pampering and purpose, with celebration weaved throughout.  Spoken - or written - like a true Taurus.  = )

Birthday = Birth Day, is marked annually, however I want to share with you an important reminder: EVERY DAY we are given a NEW DAY -  each day we have an opportunity to begin a-new, to start again, and  so,  we are truly living our BIRTH DAY every day.   I’ve just reached my 37th year, and that means that I have really celebrated  13, 505 birth days.

13, 505

Yowza.  That’s a lot of days!  Hmmm….I might like the 37 number a bit better = ).

But, back to the reason for this post.  Every day is our BIRTH DAY.   Every day we are at CHOICE to begin a-new.  How fabulous is that?   Can you feel into the truth of that?  Truly?  

Because it’s the fact, jack.  We don’t have to wait for our official birthday to come around.  We can celebrate ourselves every day.  We can choose to honor ourselves every day.  We can consciously make choices that support our desires and vision, we can infuse fun and celebration into our days, and we can take inventory of all that we are grateful for and for all that we are. 

Wait a second.  As I write this, I’m thinking about the reality that each day is a birth day.  Each day is a day to begin a-new.  So, scratch the 13, 505 number for me, would you?    I’m acutally at 1.

Happy Birth Day.

From my savvy heart to yours,

Leslie

The Savvy Woman’s Love Coach

www.BeLoveSavvy.com