Woman Desiring Relationship ~ Tip #3
Dear Savvy Woman,
Here’s today’s tip in this blog series on dating & relating:
Tip #3 ~ Get – and Date – Out of Your Comfort Zone !
I use to have a ‘type’ that I seemed to date more of (dark hair, eyes, skin = ‘exotic’). Naturally friends thought that I would end up with someone like that, but I didn’t necessarily believe that. I didn’t know what my partner/husband would look like, but I started to get clear about what we would FEEL like together as a couple – the qualities that our relationship, and he, would embody.
Where I began to find more ease, freedom and fun in my dating life was the months leading up to meeting Larry (my hubby), where I began to date out of my comfort zone. When I let go of expectations and any ‘rules’, and made my priority having fun and learning something about myself and the dating process as I went along, it was way more enjoyable for me, no matter what the outcome. Deciding to become more OPEN doesn’t mean not having personal standards, but it does mean re-examining some unrealistic – and outdated – beliefs and behaviors that aren’t serving you.
If you have a comfort zone to either your ‘type’ that you date, or the way that you go about meeting men, force yourself to step out of it. As long as you know your essentials like attraction, connection, kindness,trust, respect, humor - realize that you just don’t KNOW the how of- or some of the what – the package will show up.
Consider:
1) Letting yourself see if there’s chemistry in person that you might not sense online. Open up your age range. I have a friend who’s pregnant with her husband who is 22 years her senior, who has two grown children from his first marriage. After 8 years of marriage, they are one of the most adventurous, happy and – sexy – couples that I know.
2) Don’t stay home when a friend invites you to a seemingly more ‘couples’ event, if that’s your typical M.O. You never know who’s going to be there, or who might have available friends that they want you to meet. Just like we benefit from mixing up our professional circles (I learn so much studying other businesses and networking outside my industry), be sure to mix up your personal time as to where and how you spend it!
3) Expect to be surprised – in a lot of good ways – in this process!
Love,
Leslie
Tags: dating advice, dating approach, Leslie Stewart, life coaching; relationship coaching; self-improvement;, www.BeLoveSavvy.com